The end of a relationship really sucks. You are hurt and confused and angry. In the midst of all that pain you have to make arrangements for your children. However, you can’t seem to get anywhere when you and your spouse try talking. Sooo frustrating, right? Here are the top 3 reasons you should try family mediation BEFORE rushing to court to move you forward...
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The division of property between parties when a relationship is ending is an extremely important exercise. However, parties are sometimes so overcome with emotion that it makes the task of sharing assets a very difficult one. Mediation is a voluntary, confidential process in which a neutral third party assists the parties to communicate better so that they can arrive at an agreement without going through...
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It’s that time of year again–the start of the new academic year for primary and secondary school students. As I sat in traffic on Independence Square in Port of Spain, Trinidad, on the first day of school, I watched the crisp new blouses and shirts, blindingly white sneakers and heavy backpacks hustle by and wondered, again, if there were any tools in those backpacks...
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If you have a child who is or is soon to be a teenager and you are wondering how you are going to survive “the teenage years” then you need to stop whatever else you are doing on your computer and give this article your full attention–right now! Most of my friends are now parents of teenagers or, soon-to-be-teenagers. Some of them have...
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Last week, in attempting to convene a mediation (that is what you call the process of setting up a mediation session), one of the parties told me that she knew about mediators and mediation because, in her words, “I watch “Fairly Legal” on TV.” To say that I was flabbergasted is an understatement. For those of you who are not glued to your television...
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Last week in Trinidad there was a furore when it was announced by the Prisons Commissioner that cable television would be installed in the nation’s prisons. Citizens aired their views via radio, television and the press and it seemed that outrage was the prevailing feeling over this initiative. The majority of opinions seemed to favour the treatment of prisoners as outcasts from society who,...
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Over the past few weeks, the region’s newspapers and airwaves have been replete with stories about children who had been physically or sexually abused, neglected or abandoned by their parents or guardians. That our children need care and protection is quite clear. A few territories—Trinidad & Tobago, Guyana and Jamaica come most readily to mind—have set up organizations dedicated to child protection. The...
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When I began my studies in mediation some 7 years ago, I was drawn to the definition of conflict resolution presented by the theorist Cordula Reimann (2003) to the effect that conflict resolution is the elimination of the violent and destructive elements of a conflict leaving it as a conflict expressed in a non-violent way. It has been my experience in both litigation and...
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In the last issue I spoke about the physiological reactions experienced by a person who loses “face” and the defences which he erects when such face-loss occurs. In this issue I will outline a few techniques which a mediator can employ to break down these defences. Having experienced face-loss, which is essentially a loss of self-esteem, a party will try to re-establish...
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The concept of “face” originated in China in the 4th century, B.C. It comprised two aspects–good moral character and high social standing. A person’s “face” told the world his worth as a human being. In Western cultures, “face” can be equated to self-esteem. A person loses “face”/self-esteem when his self-image—the vision of himself which he presents to the world—is tarnished. This may occur...
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